2020.07.12 | A Listening Heart

A Listening Heart

In today’s Bible reading, Solomon, the son of King David & his wife Bathsheba, is the newly anointed King of Israel following his father’s decline and death. Becoming the successor to David wasn’t easy — there was some behind the scenes manipulation of the old king by his mother and her allies as well as the killing of his presumptuous brother Adonijah and some other enemies. But now, with his throne secure from enemies, Solomon kicks off his reign by marrying an Egyptian princess and continuing his long-standing practice of worshiping at Israel’s high places, rather than in Jerusalem where the Ark of the Covenant is awaiting the construction of Israel’s Temple. These are signs that Solomon is not off to a very good start since both marrying foreigners and high place worship are strictly forbidden by the Torah of Moses that he has inherited as Jewish law.

Today’s story begins at one of these out-of-favor high places — Gibeon. Solomon lays down to sleep and in a dream the Lord says to him: “Ask for whatever you want me to give you.” With a humble preface about his youth and responsibility as king, Solomon asks for in Hebrew, lev shome’a, a listening heart. Often translated in our Bibles as a discerning heart or in some cases a discerning mind, Solomon goes on to explain that he wants lev shome’a so he might distinguish between right and wrong in governing God’s people. Pleased that young Solomon did not ask for long life or wealth or the death of his enemies, God grants him lev hakam venavon, a wise and understanding heart, so wise and understanding that there will never be anyone like Solomon again. In addition the Lord says he will give Solomon riches and honor and long life if Solomon will walk in the ways of God. Solomon awakes, realizes he has been in a dream, and returns to Jerusalem to worship at the Ark of the Covenant.

As we at Eden UCC celebrate our 25th Open and Affirming Anniversary, I’ve been reflecting on the vital role “a listening heart” plays in cultural change, especially cultural change that requires people to transcend what they have been taught as young children by their parents, their families, their teachers, their religious leaders, and/or the values that highlighted by the community they live in. I wasn’t a member of Eden in 1993 when the question of being an “Open and Affirming” (ONA) church was taken up first by the ONA committee and then by the congregation. I can imagine that among those involved in those early conversations, surveys, and balloting in 1993-4 were those who had been taught as children that homosexuality was prohibited by the Bible, and as such was a sin to be avoided at all costs. There were also probably those who had never met a gay person or a gay couple and who couldn’t imagine what one or two together would look like, act like, or would want from non-gays in a Church environment. And almost certainly there were those who couldn’t imagine what a gay or lesbian pastor would be like in the pulpit, in the Bible study, in the community or in a pastoral counseling session. When the discussion and debate ended, the majority of members voted “yes” in March 1994 to the simple statement: We believe that all people are children of God; that persons of all ages, races and sexual orientations are part of our increasingly diverse culture. We welcome all persons into the full life and ministry of this church. I like to think that each of those “yes” votes, especially those that were cast by those from a conservative or less culturally-diverse background, were a product of a “listening heart” such as Solomon desires, a heart capable of hearing the story of another and of discerning right and wrong, rather than defaulting to what it fears out of past teaching or simple lack of familiarity.

In 2010, when I served as your Minister in Training before heading off to seminary, I staffed a two-day Building an Inclusive Church conference here for other churches interested in following the lead of Eden and other ONA churches. Our trainers were from the Institute of Welcoming Resources, a special group trained to help Churches develop a thoughtful process to consider becoming Open and Affirming, a process that would prevent without splitting the church into two warring factions, for and against inclusion. Foundational to their approach was bringing people of different sexual orientations and political and religious perspectives together in informal settings so they could meet and talk and listen to one another, discovering in the process that the experience, hopes, and the heart of the other is not really that different from one’s own.

It’s an approach that I’ve seen used to help people bridge feelings of awkwardness around people of different sexual and gender orientations, races, and socioeconomic backgrounds. As much as we all dread the moment the group facilitator says: “Find a partner who's different from you,” most of us have learned something about the other person and about ourselves in these trainings simply by listening with an open heart to that person’s story and finding that we have more in common with them than we imagined.

In the last 20 years, as LGBTQ issues, particularly gay marriage, have come to the forefront of our national and local conscience, I delight in those conversations where I have seen people’s perspectives and political views change not because they were labelled as haters or homophobic, but because they realized what LGBTQ people wanted was simply basic human rights and dignities such as work of their choosing, love, marriage, and family — rights and dignities that straight people are afforded automatically.

So, while Solomon, with all his faults and flaws so like our own, asked for a listening heart so he might govern God’s people, I tip my hat today to anyone, regardless of their past views and behaviors, whose listening heart has changed their mind, their faith, their voice, or their vote. To you, and to your willingness to bring wisdom and a loving heart to all your decisions and actions, we owe a great debt of gratitude. And I give thanks to each person, whatever their orientation or sexuality, who have had the courage to share their story over and over with others who might react harshly or with condemnation. May God bless all of us as we move forward into a new era of social justice for people of all ages, races and sexual and gender orientations. Amen.

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